


Home

by croonerboy



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Buddie Week (9-1-1 TV), Gay Evan "Buck" Buckley, M/M, Married Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-18
Updated: 2020-09-18
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:01:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26534782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/croonerboy/pseuds/croonerboy
Summary: Buck tries to tell Eddie how he feels about him before he leaves for Seattle forever.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley & Maddie Buckley, Evan “Buck” Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Kudos: 34





	Home

Eddie arranged the rolls of shirts and pants, stuffing his suitcase as tightly as he could. He learned this military style of packing when he was in the armed forces, and now it was just habit.

After he had Christopher down for the night, he packed the last of their belongings, and prepared himself for bed. 5:30 in the morning came early, and they didn’t want to miss their flight.

Even though they had lived in Los Angeles for a while now, they had very few belongings. In the process of moving from place to place looking for a city with a large enough fire department, and good schools for Christopher, they had left things behind each time, until they paired it down to the most essential things.

Eddie slipped off his shirt and pulled on a pair of sweatpants. He stood shirtless in the bathroom mirror and began brushing his teeth, when he heard a light tapping at the door.

He peered through the peep hole for a moment, unlocked and opened the door to reveal Buck standing there. Buck gave him a look up and down, taking in Eddie’s tight and muscular physique, clearing his throat before speaking.

“Hey!”, He said a little too enthusiastically. The sight of Eddie shirtless always made him a little overly excitable.

“Haigh”, Eddie muffled, foam trailing down his chin, as he continued to scrub his teeth.

“Hey… So… I know it’s kind of late…“, Buck said.

“Yeah.”, Eddie garbled with a mouthful of toothpaste. “One sheck…“

He spit into the sink. 

“Yeah We’ve got an early flight tomorrow.”, Eddie said.

“Yeah so… That’s kind of what I wanted to talk to you about. Can I come in for a second?“, Buck leaned his way in, and Eddie took a step back. Buck, hands in his pockets, pushed past Eddie and turned to face him once inside.

“So – – you’re really going to Seattle, huh?”, Buck said, looking down at his feet, then sheepishly into Eddie’s eyes.

“I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to talk to you about it, but the opportunity came up fast and I had to make a decision.“ Eddie said.

“It means a Captain’s position, and more money, and maybe even a nicer school for Christopher.“, Eddie said.

“That all sounds great.“ Buck said, sounding less than pleased.

“Yeah… I found a really nice place out there, lots of room for me and Christopher and maybe even a dog…“

“ …is there something you wanted to tell me?“, Eddie asked

“Don’t leave.”, Buck said

“It’s too late we already have tickets, everything is packed.”, Eddie said.

“No… That’s not what I meant.” , Buck said shaking his head.

Eddie cut him off. “Look... I know what you’re going to say, but after Shannon died, I’ve been having a really hard time… just I don’t know… Being in the city… In this city.“, Eddie said.

“Yeah I get that…it’s just—“, Buck tried to say.

“So I just felt like maybe it was time to start over again.“, Eddie continued.

“We’ll see each other. I’ll have you out to the new place. It’s actually not that far. We can still call each other and text, we can even FaceTime…“

“Yeah… I’ve heard all this before.”, Buck said disappointingly.

As Buck turned to leave, Eddie called after him. “Buck… Wait.”

Buck turned back to Eddie, and raised his voice in frustration. “You know, I understand what it feels like to live with a ghost. A ghost of somebody you loved. I know how hard it is every day, wishing you could be with the person you cared about so much. But you can’t let that get in the way of everything you built here. Everyone here who loves you.”, he said.

Eddie looked into Buck’s eyes and saw a kind of desperation there, as if Buck was holding something back.

“I know… I love everybody here too. You guys are like my family.”, Eddie said

“No! It’s more than that!” Buck said, almost shouting.

“You can’t leave…”, he said, pleading.

“I mean we’re moving away but and like I said, it’s not that far—”, Eddie said

“No! I mean me!”, Buck said cutting him off sharply. He lowered his voice and stared more intently into Eddie’s misty gaze. “You can’t leave me.”, he insisted, his voice breaking, tears welling in his eyes.

Before Eddie could speak, Buck grabbed him, pulling him into a tight embrace, kissing him squarely on the lips. Eddie fell into the lip-lock, his mind swirling, The sudden rush of emotion overcoming him like a wave.

He pulled back from the kiss for a moment. They stared into each other’s eyes, searching—each one looking at the other like an entirely new person they never realized was there before.

Then Buck turned on his heels and left as fast as he could. He was out the door gone as Eddie called after him, “Buck wait!”, but he was off into the night.

The next morning Eddie and Christopher arrived in a cab at the airport, and proceeded to go through check-in. The whole time, Eddie could not stop thinking about Buck. Stubborn, impulsive, soft-hearted and sometimes overly emotional Buck. His lost little puppy dog look, that he gives whenever he has made a mistake or disappointed Eddie, or anyone really. The way he smiles and lights up the room whenever he sees Eddie, and especially Christopher. He didn’t think anyone could love Christopher more than he could, but he was pretty sure Buck could out-love almost anyone, except maybe Christopher himself. It was then that he realized, how much he loved Buck.

Up on the roof, he meant what he said, but maybe it meant just a little bit more. Maybe— just maybe, this one fact, was enough. For the first time ever, he considered that he might have been running all along, away from the one thing, the one person he should have been running toward.

As the plane began to board, Eddie and Christopher were called up first, as disabled passengers pre-board. Christopher hopped up and started to amble toward the gate, when Eddie stopped him in mid-stride. He knelt down in front of his son and looked him in the eye and said, “Hey buddy, hold on a second.”

“What’s up, Dad?”, Christopher asked.

“I wanted to ask you something…”, He looked down and tried to gather his thoughts.

“How would you feel, if we stayed here, and umm didn’t go to Seattle.”, he asked.

Christopher smiled and looked into Eddie’s eyes reassuring him.

“That sounds good Dad.”, he said.

“Okay…One more thing… So…I wanted to ask you about Buck…”

“Buck!”, Christopher said, grinning wide.

“Yeah—about Buck…”, Eddie said.

“No! Dad, Look!”, Christopher exclaimed as he pointed over Eddie’s shoulder.

Eddie turned and saw Buck coming toward him at a clip that almost broke into a full on run.

Maddie was not far behind him.

“Eddie!”, Buck exclaimed, “Wait!”, but Eddie was frozen in place. He wasn’t going anywhere even if he could have. Buck reached Eddie and began to speak between exasperated breaths.

“I needed to tell you something…”, Buck said.

“If it’s about last night, then don’t even worry about it. It doesn’t matter.”, Eddie said.

“What do you mean?”, Buck said, concerned he might have come all this way for nothing.

“I mean—I don’t mean—“, Eddie stammered.

Buck looked so disappointed. And then, a look of restrained anger crossed his face, as he tried to sort out his feelings.

“Tell me!” Buck demanded.

“Ok.. “ Eddie said as firmly and calmly as he could. Eddie placed a hand on Buck’s shoulder. This reassuring touch always put Buck at ease. Eddie had a way with his tone that was so loving, so parental. It always made Buck feel safe.

Eddie began to speak in earnest. Buck listened intently, as he looked into the steady gaze of Eddie’s eyes. They had the look and the warmth of a sip of aged whisky, and were almost as sweet as the words Buck heard from Eddie’s lips.

“You know, I can stay here, or move to Seattle, or halfway around the world. But anywhere I go—it won’t feel like a home without you. You...ARE my home.”, Eddie said.

I’ve been holding on to this for a while now. I wanted to give it to you before.”, Eddie continued. He looked down at his ring finger.

“It’s my old wedding band. I know it’s not much, but it represents a promise. A promise unfulfilled between me and Shannon. I kept it because it represents my love. The love I had for her. And you are the only person I can think of who deserves that love more. The only person I love more than her, and after Christopher, the only _man_ I _ever_ loved.

You give so much. You risk your life every day for strangers, and you defend and love my son like he’s your own. You have saved both our lives more times than you know. And you smile through every single bad thing in front of you. And even when you thought you had nothing left to give, you chose us before yourself.

All I want to do is spend every single day trying to be even half as selfless...half as brave. You make me more than I ever thought I could be. You showed me how to love again, after so much loss. You gave me back to myself. At first, I felt scared and embarrassed by my feelings for you. But when I thought I might lose you up on that roof? I knew it didn’t matter. Because nothing scares me more than the thought I might lose you. I don’t care if some people don’t understand. I know you. I trust you. I need you. And I don’t want to spend another second being ashamed or afraid. I love you, and I hope I’m right, in thinking you love me too…”

“So…”, He continued, pulling the ring from his finger and getting down on one knee, taking Buck’s hand in his own. He was shaking as he looked up into Buck’s eyes, praying he saw agreement there. He offered the ring up, his eyes wet.

“Evan Buckley, will you do me the great honor of marrying me?”, he said as he saw a look of consternation come across Buck’s face. Eddie’s face fell into disappointment, and he thought he should just stand back up.

“Buck, say yes!”, Christopher said. This made Buck laugh nervously. He gave Christopher a smile that was part loving and part heartbreak. He glanced up at Maddie, and she gave him a look that said, ‘Come on already!’. He put his hand on Eddie’s shoulder, stopping him from rising to his feet. 

To Eddie’s surprise, Buck also got down on one knee. He removed a ring box from his own pocket. He turned it slowly over in his hands, before meeting Eddie’s gaze, which had brightened considerably. The look was quizzical, but also relived.

“So…I have been carrying _this_ thing around for a while now.”, Buck looked up at Eddie, and saw his eyes filled with tears.

Christopher looked up at Maddie and she gave him a reassuring squeeze from behind.

“It’s ok buddy.”, she smiled down at him. She whispered, “Just watch.”

Buck began again. “So— I am not as good with words as you are, but here it goes…

All my life, I struggled to find somewhere I belonged. I went from job to job, girl to girl, searching for something or someone to hold on to. But no matter where I went, or who I latched onto, it just never took.”, Buck’s voice quavered as he said, “And then—and then I met you.”

Eddie was in a full weep now, and he wiped tears away from his eyes with the back of his hand.

This made tears roll down Buck’s cheeks as well, but he let them fall and continued, opening the ring box as he did so.

“I was going to return this ring I bought for Abby, but then I thought I might have it reset into a different band. I figured I could wear it to help keep women away.”, Buck laughed to himself.

“ I decided I would just tell them I was already married so… then I wouldn’t have to risk getting hurt…but it didn’t work.”, he said, exhaling.

Eddie put a reassuring hand on his shoulder and fought back the urge to pull Buck into him and right on to the floor in a bear hug.

“Anyway—after the whole thing on that rooftop, when I realized how wrong I was, and how badly I wanted to live. I also realized why. It’s you Eddie. It’s always been you. From the minute you came into my life, I have wanted nothing else. He continued, his voice breaking. Back when I was Buck 1.0, I slept around, trying to cover up my feelings, hiding who I was. And you made me realize that I could love all day long, but it was never going to matter until I decided to love myself. You gave me that Eddie, You made me see myself as worthy of love. It’s just like you said—“you gave me back to myself.” And for the first time in my life, I feel complete. A wise man, once told me, ‘You don’t find a great love like this...You make it.’ And I can’t think of another person on this earth, I would rather spend my life making a love like that with. I was only hoping maybe, after everything, you might feel the same way I do…”

Eddie cut him off and pulled him into a kiss, that almost toppled them both over.

“I do.”, He said earnestly, as he pulled his mouth away, their foreheads keeping contact.

“So…You do?!”, Buck said, smiling through tears, relieved. He could not remember the last time he was this happy.

Buck turned to Maddie and Christopher and said gleefully, almost shouting, “HE DOES!”

Maddie rolled her eyes. “Duh!” She said.

Both men stood up to full height and wrapped their arms around each other in a long rocking embrace, kissing one another between squeezes. Christopher squealed in delight as they rushed to him, and swept him up in to their arms, and kissed his face all over until the giggles bubbled out of him. In the rush of emotion, they had forgotten all about the rings.

“The rings!”, Maddie piped up in mid embrace with all three of her favorite boys.

Buck ran over and scooped them up off the floor, where they had been dropped. He handed the one meant for him, over to Eddie, looked at him and Maddie saying, “It’s too bad the rest of the crew couldn’t be here to see this.”, Buck said, sounding a little disappointed.

“Let me see what I can do about that.”, Maddie said. She turned and faced the rest of the onlookers in the gate’s waiting area, which Eddie had realized up til now he had not even noticed, as Maddie stuck her fingers in her mouth and gave a whistle.

“Guys! You’re up!”, she shouted.

Eddie looked and saw several people drop what they were reading. Some were in wide brim hats, some had collars turned up. It took him a second before he realized everyone was already here. One by one, the crew all stood up. Abuela stood up. They all clapped and cheered. Eddie turned to Buck who was giving him one of his signature mischievous grins.

“You did this?”, Eddie said.

“WE did.”, Maddie said, hugging her brother around the waist. “Buck knocked on my door last night, and he was pretty shook up and more excited then I think I have ever seen him. We had a long talk and— well the rest is history.”, she said.

“Last call for flight 247 to Seattle now boarding.”, the overhead PA system chimed in.

“We better get to it then, huh?”, Eddie said.

It hit Buck all at once. Eddie was leaving. His mind raced as he spat out the words: “Marry Me!”

“I already said—“, Eddie began.

“No, I mean right here. Right now.”, Buck insisted.

“Right here?”, Eddie said, in a quizzical tone.

“Yes.”, Buck said emphatically. He was not going to let another person he loved, leave him behind. This time, he was going to seal the deal. This one was not getting away. Eddie turned to Christopher to get his approval.

“What do you think buddy?”, he asked, already knowing the answer.

“Definitely, YES!”, Christopher said, more certainly than Eddie had ever heard him sound before—“Do it Dads!”, he ordered, making everyone smile and laugh to themselves.

Eddie shrugged and said: “OK! But how do we do this?”

“Funny you should ask…”, Maddie interjected again. But it just so happens, it is really easy to become legally ordained on the internet. She pulled a printed, sheet of paper from her jacket pocket and un folded it.

“This little piece of paper right here, gives me the right to marry you in the state of California.”, she said with pride as she fluttered her eyes at Eddie.

Eddie looked at Buck, who again was grinning from ear to ear, with a look of wonder on his face. He didn’t know what to say. Buck shrugged his shoulders and said, “Well— I figured I’d take a shot. I know it’s really fast and we can wait…I can come out to Seattle with you, whatever.”

He glanced over to the gate attendant and waved them on. He watched as they closed the gate.

“Bah, I’ll take a different flight.”, Eddie said.

Buck kissed him and looked around at all his friends.

“Save some for the honeymoon guys!”, Chim teased, to which Hen elbowed him and gave him a dour look.

“Don’t yuk their yum.”, she scolded.

“It was a joke!”, he said, making Maddie roll her eyes.

“Ahem,” she cleared her throat.

“So do you Evan Buckley—“, she began, before Eddie interrupted.

“Wait, what about vows??”, he said.

“Well I don’t know about you all, but those proposals—sounded like pretty good vows to me.”, Athena said to the group. Everyone nodded in agreement. “Now let’s get on to the good part.”, she prodded. “I think you boys have waited long enough.”, she said.

“So!”, Maddie said, picking up where she left off.

“Do you Evan Buckley take this man, Eddie Diaz, to be your lawfully wedded husband?”, she asked.

Buck could Barely contain him self as he slipped the ring on Eddie’s finger. His hands shook so much that Eddie had to guide Buck’s hand. He nodded, to Buck as the ring slipped into place, encouraging him to go on.

“I do. I definitely, definitely do!”, he said almost too loudly. He thought he might pass out from sheer joy.

Maddie went on, “And do you, Eddie Diaz, take Evan—uhh—Buck, to be your lawfully wedded husband?”, she asked.

“Hell yes, I do.”, Eddie said. He thought he might never stop smiling or crying. 

Abuela coughed, and Eddie looked over at her and down at Christopher, in shame.

“I mean. HECK YEAH, I DO!”, Eddie said as he placed the ring on Buck’s finger.

Christopher looked up at his 2 dads and giggled, grinning.

“KISS!” he yelled, causing another ripple of laughs from the crowd.

Maddie held up a hand. “Almost…”, she said.

“Then by the power invested in me by the Church of the Internet and the City of Los Angeles, I now pronounce you, married.”

She turned to face the crowd of onlookers, family and friends.

“Everyone—I give you, Mister and Mister Diaz-Buckley!”, she announced.

Eddie tapped her on the shoulder and whispered in her ear.

Maddie leaned in, listening, as Buck gave Eddie a questioning look.

“CORRECTION,” she announced. “I give you Mr. and Mr, BUCKLEY-Diaz!”

Eddie smiled and winked at Evan. Buck looked like he might cry again.

“Aww, you remembered.”, Buck said.

“Of course I did”, Eddie said, “You don’t think I know my own _husband_?”

“You may now Kiss… Uh AGAIN!”, Maddie said.

“YEAH!”, Christopher cheered raising a fist into the air.

And with that, Eddie and Buck brought their lips together in a full on, out in the open, right there in front of the whole world kiss.

Everyone watching brought out a popper, and cracked them open, pulling on the strings and releasing confetti and streamers in to the air.

After the ruckus settled down, Bobby spoke.

“Well it’s a good thing this all worked out, because there is a reception and open bar for anyone who would like to come by our place and celebrate the newlyweds.”, Bobby said, slipping his arm around Athena’s waist.

Athena looked up at Bobby like he was crazy.

“What did you do?!”, she said.

“Don’t worry about it… I had a little help.”, he said shrugging his shoulder in the direction of Josh and Micheal. Athena glared over at them.

“What can I say? I love to throw a party!”, Josh said, trying to assuage her.

“As long as you all help clean up, I suppose it’s fine.”, Athena conceded, looking back at Bobby and the kids.

“Don’t worry, we will.”, they said in unison.

“MMMhmm…”, she said holding back a smile.

The reception was lovely. The house and yard was awash with white lights strung everywhere, there were fresh flowers and balloons and even some gifts. A wedding cake that looked just like the 118 firehouse, with two little firefighters on top. They even remembered to paint in Bucks red hair and birthmarks.

“Looks just like you.”, Eddie said.

“Actually, I am a little taller.”, Buck said.

There was even room for a makeshift dance floor. Hen volunteered to be DJ and Karaoke Master of Ceremonies, and Chim and Karen, greeted guests and helped serve drinks. It was perfect.

Hen took the microphone and announced, “Ladies, Gentleman, and Gender Fluid guests…May I present to you the Happy couple, and there fist dance.”

Buck took Eddie’s arm into the crook of his own and led him to the dance floor.

The music began. And the held one another so close, Buck could feel Eddie’s gentle breath on his neck, as he lay his hear on buck’s shoulder, his eyes closed. He was lost in the moment. In a place where only the two of them existed. Swaying back and forth, back and forth, drunk on champagne and true love. The music washed over them and Eddie could hear Buck’s heart beating softly in time with his own. Buck, eyes closed, gently lead them round and round, finally feeling at peace and at home.

_I hear a song,_

_Drifting on the horizon_

_The melody is so sweet, so sweet_

_Who composed the tune?_

_It lifts my heart higher_

_I sit down to retire_

_And hear what it has to say_

_Love is here,_

_I don't wanna lose it no_

_The tune it was so inspiring,_

_It kept my body rising,_

_Absorption taking place_

_The melody so lovely,_

_The tune it was so subtle_

_The world's a wonderful place_

_I see him now,_

_The clouds begin to disperse_

_To reveal a wonderful presence,_

_A presence full of love_

_He is so lovely,_

_Standing there looking after me_

_Seeing just how I feel,_

_The presence of love itself_

_Love is here,_

_I don't wanna lose it no_

_The tune it was so inspiring,_

_It kept my body rising,_

_Absorption taking place_

_The melody so lovely,_

_The tune it was so subtle_

_The world's a wonderful place_

_Dum, dum dum, duh duh dum…._

_Love is here,_

_I don't wanna lose it no_

_The tune it was so inspiring,_

_It kept my body rising,_

_Absorption taking place_

_The melody so lovely,_

_The tune it was so… subtle_

_The world's a wonderful place_

_Love is here_

_Love is here_

_Love is here_

_Love…is… here._

_<https://youtu.be/b-L1EfEHqLA> _

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[podfic] Home](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29802558) by [Matriaya](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Matriaya/pseuds/Matriaya)




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